Part Twenty-Seven: Praise God! The First Week of 2024 is Behind Us
Anyone else doing Partially Dry January?
It was a short week, but still a bitch and absolutely exhausting. Thank you to all of you who jumped in after my last post to help with my job search. I honestly meant only to vent; I had no idea I’d get so many offers of assistance. You made me cry.
Easy to do these days.
On Saturday night I Zoomed with a very dear friend from middle school and high school. Maybe elementary school. Who can recall? She’s really smart. Always was. And gorgeous. No one likes her. I’m kidding. She’s a grief coach, life coach, all these good things, and her voice is the definition of soothing.
She asked me how I was doing and it took everything I had not to cry. Maybe I was particularly tired that day. Could be. I went for an ENTIRE WALK earlier and had to nap afterward. Both boys were like, are you ok? I didn’t answer. I was snoring. Or close to a coma. (Fingers crossed!)
Yesterday another dear friend, from my Ridgewood days (Go Maroons!), worked with me for 90-minutes on my resume. She’s a hiring specialist and damn good. I now have a C.V. that makes me sound, dare I say it? Impressive.
More smoke! More mirrors!
Seriously though, I am so grateful.
In other news, in an effort to shed some weight and protect my esophagus from further damage, I began my version of Dry January. I laid off the wine from New Year’s Day until Friday evening. That doesn’t sound like much but, since we had to be in court last Thursday, I think it’s a win that I didn’t pour Pinot Noir directly down my throat that night. Because I wanted to.
In any case, my plan is to allow myself a bit of the grape on Friday and Saturday only. I hate it. It’s a terrible plan. I know it’s good for me, but I don’t want what’s good for me. I want what will help me relax. Ease my anxiety. Send me off into LaLa Land where the only unknown is where Rob and I will have dinner that night.
Court. AGAIN. The drive there. The appearance. The drive home. Interminable. Stressful. By the time I got to my desk it was all I could do not to put my head down on it and nap. And dream of a glass of wine.
The item in the photo above? I want it. It’s on my Amazon wish list. Right above my wish to go to Betty Ford. For a year. Alone. With conjugal visits from Rob.
One of the things I do to keep my mind off the fact that I HAVE NO IDEA WHEN THIS WILL END is read. A lot. I just finished “But You Seemed So Happy” by Kimberly Harrington. I think I liked it. Parts of it, anyway. If you pick it up, don’t look at the author's photo until you’re done reading it. I made the mistake of looking and it colored the entire rest of the book for me. I mean, talk about resting (active?) bitch face. Yeah, no.
At present I’m reading “Drinking Games” by Sarah Levy. Yeah, drinking, not drinking is on my mind this partially Dry January. I really feel for the author, though I’m not enamored with her writing style. Because I’m not sure she has one.
God, that wasn’t nice. Sorry, Sarah.
One of the other things I’m doing to keep my mind off the fact that I HAVE NO IDEA WHEN THIS WILL END is practicing gratitude. I wrote to a friend this morning and told her that I’m embracing this time with my boys, both of whom are happy to be together, to be with me, and to be in their own house. Life isn't perfect, but it doesn't suck.
You’ve got to find the silver linings. And maybe get that winebag chair.
If you’d like to read parts 1-26 of Life On The Inside, you can do so here.
As always, thank you so very much for taking this journey with me. I appreciate it and you more than I can say!