“The prosecutor said if it were up to him, he’d approve the plan today. But he’s got to take it to his boss.”
Wait. What? “I thought he was the boss. He has a boss?”
“Yeah, the head of the department.”
How did I not know this? Did I learn nothing from all those episodes of Law & Order? And Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and Law & Order: High Crimes and Misdemeanors, which I think I just made up or maybe not. I don’t know. I can’t think straight. I thought there was just ONE guy. ONE prosecutor we were dealing with. You know, the Jack McCoy of Stafford County.
“He has a boss?” I say again.
“Yes,” Cary replies, with the patience of the very well paid saint he is. “But it looks good.”
“Really?”
“They just, they want to meet him.”
My son needs to meet the prosecutor? And, apparently, his boss who is, maybe?, the actual Jack McCoy of Stafford County in which case – wowser. What am I wearing?
“I need you to make a video of him. Talking.”
Oh God, more talking. “About what?”
“Soccer. About his love for soccer.”
Oh God, when Mr. Happy gets going, it's like being waterboarded. The prosecutor and the Jack McCoy of Stafford County will have me arrested for cruel and unusual punishment.
Now I really need to figure out what I’m wearing.
I ask the only things that come to mind: Why? When do you need it? How long should it be? Do I email it or text?
Of all Cary’s answers, which include, because the extent of his disability is most evident when he’s talking, as soon as possible, as long as it takes, and text is fine, because the extent of his disability is most evident when he’s talking is the one that worries me most.
Mr. Happy loves to be the center of attention. It’s when he’s at his best. It’s terrible to think this, let alone write it, but what if he rises to the opportunity and comes off as not disabled enough? What if the extent of his disability doesn’t appear as extensive as his neurological evaluation says it is? What if he doesn’t waterboard the prosecutor and the Jack McCoy of Stafford County?
And why, why, do situations like this – the Medicaid waiver intake evaluation, full-day neurological testing, any time he has to appear in court – make me feel like I have to root against my kid?
I’m not the only one. Ask any parent of a special needs child and they’ll tell you the same thing: when it comes to jumping through the hoops involved in getting your kid the help they need, you best be sure your kid’s shoelaces are tied together at the starting line, that you’ve kept them up all night the night before so they’re sleep deprived and slightly crazed, and definitely don’t feed them. That’s a biggie! Sleep deprived and slightly hypoglycemic is the way to go to get that home health aide! That job coach! A spot in that new IDD living facility!
It sucks.
“You like?”
Mr. Happy walks toward me smiling and tugging on the red and white soccer jersey he’s wearing along with his ripped white skinnies as he calls them, his silver chains hanging off his belt loops. He’s shaved and brushed his hair which, despite being really long, looks a helluva lot better than the Travis Bickle Taxi Driver skinhead thing he was sporting for awhile.
I like, I reply.
The tripod’s on the table. My phone’s in it. And I can tell he’s excited. He sits down on the sofa, puts his elbows on his knees, and leans in.
“You ready?” I ask.
“Yup,” he replies.
I walk over and press the red record button. Then, ok, baby, I say. Tell us about your love for soccer.
I was completely overwhelmed by the comments, and texts, and emails, so many emails, after my last post. Thank you so much for all your love and support and encouragement. And yes, I cried when Mr. Rugby said “I’ve got him.” I cried sharing it with you, too. And I cried because we, Stu and I, didn’t want that. I still don’t. Making sure that doesn’t have to happen is what Rob and I are working on. Thank God for Rob. Thank God for Mr. Rugby. Thank God for all of you.
Now that stand up comedy is out you can move onto hoop jumping in the circus as your next gig 😁
What a cliffhanger!! How long was the video? Was it everything you hoped it would be? Did you get water boarded?? We need to know 😳