Building Resilience | 14
Building Resilience | 14
Resilience, refueling, and fun
A week from today I turn 61. I’m not telling you this so you’ll say, “Wow, Susan, you look great!” (Though you can if you’d like — and thank you!) I’m telling you to make the point that there’s no age at which the need for resilience ends.
You probably know that, but in my 20s and 30s, I really thought all I needed to do was buckle down and work hard and I’d land a big job for big bucks and then I’d be all set. Whew! All done being driven! No more striving and proving myself. I’d arrive, put my feet up, and relax. My resilience could take a well-deserved nap.
Pretend me in my 30s being “all done being driven.” Image by Canva Pro
Ha.
I know now that it doesn’t work like that. There’s always something, good or bad, to get through, survive, accomplish, or conquer. It could be something as simple as an insane work deadline or a long list of errands we’re too tired to run.
But we make the deadline because we need the job.
We run the errands because we’ve gotta have coffee and milk for the morning.
We do what needs to be done because we’re resilient.
There isn’t a day that goes by when we aren’t called upon to work our resilience muscle. It’s exhausting. In this newsletter, I talk all the time about how to build that muscle and why you should do so, but this week I’m going to talk about something a little different.
I’m going going to talk about one of the ways we can refuel and combat the exhaustion that results from the constant need for resilience. I’m going to talk about . . .
Fun.
Me and my dear friend, Laura, having fun in the face of death at the February 11 Death Doula Day at Historic Congressional Cemetery where I had the pleasure of speaking with a great group of women. Photo by Erin
For me, fun is meeting new people and talking with them about things I think are important. Grief, resilience, writing, humor, mental health, raising a child with autism, widowhood, and/or wine. (Somehow wine usually works its way in. I swear I have no idea how that happens.)
This past Saturday, I got to meet a great group of women who wanted to talk with me about resilience and widowhood. (But not wine. They were hot tea people and besides, it was 10 a.m.) I hope they got as much from the conversation as I did because I left renewed and refueled.
That’s what fitting fun into our lives does for us.
So, when was the last time you had fun?
If you’re struggling to find an answer, let’s get you some fun, fast.
Start by making a list of things you find fun to do. I’ll share my list (not including the stuff I mentioned earlier) to help you get started:
Reading
Texting with my brothers who make me laugh until I cry
Watching movies with my husband
Taking target practice at the range (as opposed to the beach where it’s frowned upon)
Reading
Watching comedy specials and discovering new comedians like this terrific lady, Sheila McMahon, whose “mental health comedy” is more than hysterical. It’s life-saving.
Paddleboarding … or attempting to!
Playing board games with my husband and our kids
Have I mentioned reading?
I hope you’ll make your own list and make time to do something you find fun this week. In fact, I hope you’ll do more than one fun thing! I also hope that, if you have a moment, you’ll leave me a comment about the fun stuff you have planned. I’d love to hear.
See you in 7!
Susan
I so appreciate you encouraging your family and friends to give Building Resilience a try. After last week’s newsletter, I picked up several new subscribers. Thank you so very much for your continued support.
Find me elsewhere:
Website: SusanMcCorkindale.com
YouTube: TED Talk
Instagram: susanmccorkindale
Read the opening of my new book BOUNCE: A Memoir of Resilience here